First, I’m so sorry that you are a fellow victim of abuse. I hear you. I understand this post so well.
I thought I had cut all of our mutual contacts out. It seemed easier, not cowardly. Every time I turned around, I was attacked again for muddying his name when he “did nothing” or I had “blown the incident out of proportion.” His story always changed, but no one ever noticed. I posted on Facebook after we got a conviction, thinking it was safe to speak up. I had forgotten I had friended his neighbor years ago. She laid into me. She clearly believed his lies. I blocked her. Now I write in cryptic articles that are published in places I know they will never read my words. It just feels safer to know my story won’t be disparaged.
I hope you are able to find the right answer for yourself. But please keep yourself safe above all else. Hugs.